Sydney, The Moseff Report — The Coalition Government has decided to reverse planned deregulation of university fees in the wake of Socialist Alternative’s takeover of the ABC panel show Q & A on Monday night.
‘These protests clearly and articulately showed the Australian people that fee deregulation is a bad idea’, said Minister for Education Christopher Pyne. ‘Their take-over of Q & A has convinced me, along with the rest of Cabinet, that an increase in university fees should not occur’.
‘It is obvious that the university sector does not need more funding, given the already highly meritorious debating skills of these protesting university students’, Pyne added. ‘Unveiling a banner on live TV to address a complex policy issue — if only I had thought of that’.
In the name of balance, the ABC has announced that next week they will allow the Young Liberals to hijack Q & A with banners displaying the slogans ‘Daddy will pay for my education, not yours’ and ‘University — If you’re white, it’s alright!’
‘Allowing protestors of a different political viewpoint is the best way to ensure a lively democratic discussion’, said a spokesperson the ABC.